To Tweet or Not to Tweet

Other than Facebook, perhaps nothing on the Web these days is bigger than microblogging site Twitter. It lets people speak their minds in 140 characters or less. But I don't get it. I mean, I get it -- it's essentially a mini blog. You post about the guy standing ahead of you in line in the grocery store. Or that your girlfriend accepted your marriage proposal. Or that you're about to bungee jump off Niagara Falls. You share (mini) links, post pictures or videos, whatever. What I don't get about Twitter is what it offers people that updating their Facebook status doesn't. I can make a comment in my status about standing in line at Safeway or bungee jumping. I can even write on my own Wall with pictures of such events. And if I want the news, I can get it the old-fashioned way by reading the paper, watching the 11:00 newscast, or my favorite local station's website. And why is tweeting so important? Does everyone living in this digital world have this insatiable need to be connected every nanosecond? Who really gives a damn if I just bought Chinese takeout or that I've run out of condoms? Do celebs and the average Joe really need a Twitter account? Are all the "cool kids" on Twitter now? Maybe for businesses and the media Twitter is useful, but I'm still not sold on the whole phenomenon. Maybe tweeting is just a fad and eventually the only things that tweet are the only ones that should -- the birds. I was intrigued by Twitter at first and even signed up, but I changed my mind. No matter how hard I try to understand it or how many times I watch this video, this little tweety bird has managed to escape my brain's grasp. So, until I catch that damn bird, I'll just stick to my Facebook page and this blog as my two social-networking tools. And if someone ever asks me, "What are you doing?" (Twitter's marketing pitch), I'll just smile and tell 'em to check my Facebook status and/or text me. The only tweeting I care to engage in is after I've eaten a plate of beans.